Search Results for "one-grump-or-two"

One Grump Or Two

One Grump Or Two

The Grumpy Guide to Modern Life, from Call Centres to Getting a Decent Cup of Tea

  • Author: Arthur Grump
  • Publisher: Anova Books
  • ISBN: 9781906032531
  • Category: Humor
  • Page: 160
  • View: 7670
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All you want is a decent cup of tea. But oh no, modern Britain wants to sell you a fancy Dan coffee in a mug the size of a popcorn bucket, complete with double cream, chocolate sprinkles, and no change from a five pound note. Everywhere you look, modern life has turned common sense completely on its head.

The Grumpy Driver's Handbook

The Grumpy Driver's Handbook

  • Author: Cedric Grump,Ivor Grump
  • Publisher: Portico
  • ISBN: 9781906032791
  • Category: Humor
  • Page: 168
  • View: 4258
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Following in the curmudgeonly footsteps of One Grump or Two, The Grumpy Driver's Handbook is a celebration of all that is miserable and tedious on the road. Driving brings out the worst in even the most mild mannered individual and so a book on the worst habits in motoring and the "joys" of car ownership is the natural gift for the career grump. Spurred on by endless roadworks, coned-off lanes, BMW drivers, white van men, speed cameras, lunatic cyclists, rude taxi drivers, and kamikaze motorcyclists, the grump has an ocean of opportunity for expression. The Grumpy Driver's Handbook (including "The Highway Grump") tackles the evils of lane swappers, caravan owners, bumper huggers, rubber neckers, light jumpers, hard shoulder cruisers, sleeping policemen, and speaking policemen.

The Grumpy Golfer's Handbook

The Grumpy Golfer's Handbook

  • Author: Ivor Grump
  • Publisher: Anova Books
  • ISBN: 9781906032975
  • Category: Humor
  • Page: 167
  • View: 3020
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Following in the curmudgeonly footsteps of One Grump or Two and The Grumpy Driver’s Handbook, Grumpy Golfer is a compilation of all things miserable about playing golf. Mark Twain famously said, “golf is a good walk spoiled,” but actually it’s a lot worse than that. Golf can be a good life spoiled after you become enraged with the behaviour of a Stableford competitor and bury a sand wedge in a place where it’s impossible to get relief. All the evils of golf are included: the slice, the hook, the snap-hook, the shank, the first tee duff and the yips. There are also sections on annoying hazards, such as lakes, streams, trees, deep bunkers, greenkeepers, dog walkers and bringing along the girlfriend. There are the usual tirades against a variety of golf-themed items: clubhouses, two-tier driving ranges, golf gloves, ladies tees, pitch and putt, the 1-iron, geriatric fourballs, golf magazines, scorecard pencils, Peter Allis, links courses, bizarre putters, metal drivers and winter rules. All in all, a great book for grumps.

The Bad Dog's Diary

The Bad Dog's Diary

A Year in the Life of Blake: Lover ... Fighter ... Dog

  • Author: Martin Howard
  • Publisher: Pavilion Books
  • ISBN: 1909396672
  • Category: Humor
  • Page: 300
  • View: 2047
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Blake is a loveable mongrel just trying to lead a happy life; he loves his owner, fiercely defends his territory against interlopers (including the owners new lady friend and her cat), does his best to avoid the frequently threatened neutering and spends a lot of his time either scooting across the carpet or chasing local tail. It really is a dogs life, and Blake has kindly taken the time to keep a diary of a year in his own life providing a hilarious, unputdownable glimpse into the mind and world of your average mutt.

Germs!

Germs!

An epic tale on a tiny scale

  • Author: Martin Howard
  • Publisher: Pavilion Children's
  • ISBN: 9781843651192
  • Category: Juvenile Nonfiction
  • Page: 32
  • View: 1234
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An imaginative and action-packed story with a particularly relevant message for today - wash your hands! A great way for parents to help their children to react to the current flu pandemic. Stunning illustrations featuring hundreds of quirky characters. A special 4 page gatefold fold-out shows the armies lined up for battle. Our story begins with the rumble of war as Sam, a young germ, is conscripted to fight in the Germ Army. Their ultimate goal? To attack the boy in striped pyjamas who comes into the bathroom each day. When the boy in the striped pyjamas fails to wash his hands one day, the germs seize their opportunity to attack, only to be met with the friendly Antibody Army. A great battle ensues, but which side is Sam really on? An hilarious look at the germs that live with us every day and their battle to take control of our bodies with a message – BE SURE TO WASH YOUR HANDS! For children aged 5–8.

A Monster Helping of Horrid Henry 3-in-1

A Monster Helping of Horrid Henry 3-in-1

Horrid Henry Rocks/Zombie Vampire/Monster Movie

  • Author: Francesca Simon
  • Publisher: Hachette UK
  • ISBN: 1444009826
  • Category: Juvenile Fiction
  • Page: 304
  • View: 1249
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A collection of twelve classic stories about everyone's favourite horrid boy, including the one in which Horrid Henry makes his own scary movie, The Undead Demon Monster Who Would Not Die.

Witches at War!: The Wickedest Witch

Witches at War!: The Wickedest Witch

  • Author: Martin Howard
  • Publisher: Pavilion Books
  • ISBN: 1843652161
  • Category: Juvenile Fiction
  • Page: 300
  • View: 3348
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An hilariously funny and entertaining story of the world of witches for 8-12 year olds

Witches at War!: The Wild Winter

Witches at War!: The Wild Winter

  • Author: Martin Howard
  • Publisher: Pavilion Books
  • ISBN: 1843652439
  • Category: Juvenile Nonfiction
  • Page: 300
  • View: 323
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The third and much anticipated final instalment in the highly-praised Witches at War! seriesHilarious fun for children aged 8+ and brilliant for parents and children to read togetherStunning illustrations throughout As youll recall, the previous book in the series ended with a shocking revelation. Now, Sam and her mentor, the incompetent and rude but strangely likeable Esmelia Sniff, have been separated and evil is beginning to dominate the world. Its the longest, coldest winter since records began and the newspapers are reporting sightings of strange and evil creatures making their way towards the Bleak Fortress. Inside the fortress Sam is a prisoner to Diabolica's evil plans while her friend, the potion expert Helza Poppin, is trapped in the dungeon and scheduled for torture. Things aint looking good. Approximately 35,000 words/Age range: 8+ Follow Esmelia Sniff on Twitter:@esmeliasniff and on Facebook Other titles in the Witches at War! series include The Wickedest Witch (9781843651314) and The White Wand (9781843651345).

Funk & Wagnalls Standard Junior School Dictionary of the English Language

Funk & Wagnalls Standard Junior School Dictionary of the English Language

Giving the Spelling, Division, Pronunciation and Meaning of More Than 39,000 Words and Phrases, with Illustrative Examples of Their Correct Use in English Speech and Literature, Together with 4,000 Synonyms and 1,500 Pictorial Illustrations in Half-tone, Line, and Color, Including Full-page Plates

  • Author: Charles Earle Funk
  • Publisher: N.A
  • ISBN: N.A
  • Category: English language
  • Page: 752
  • View: 7510
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New Standard Pocket Dictionary

New Standard Pocket Dictionary

Giving the Spelling, Division, Pronunciation, Meaning and Etymology of 50,000 Words and Phrases, with Illustrative Examples of Their Correct Use in English Speech and Literature, Together with 5,000 Synonyms and 1,800 Pictorial Illustrations in Half-tone and Line

  • Author: Charles Earle Funk
  • Publisher: N.A
  • ISBN: N.A
  • Category:
  • Page: 1008
  • View: 7234
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